I used to have a Leaf Nazi. Specifically, I used to live next to a Leaf Nazi. Her and her husband were renting the house next to ours. She was a nice enough person. As long as you didn’t talk to her too much, or look directly at her.
Our Leaf Nazi had a particular trait. She liked her driveway, and walkways to be completely cleaned of any debris. Sweeping was her compulsion. Constant sweeping. Morning and evening. And one of our trees loved making her crazy.
yes, I said one of our trees loved making her crazy. Now, we humans anthropomorphize everything. We do it with our pets, some of us do it with plants, you get the idea. I swear that this tree had it in for our Leaf Nazi. Why? Because this particular tree would hold onto its leaves way past when all the rest of the trees on the block had dumped theirs. This tree has been here since the house was built back in the early 50′s. It has been around the block, so to speak. I don’t know why the tree did what it did with its leaves, but I do know that it would drop some leaves each day. The Leaf Nazi would come out of her house, grumbling all the way. She would then sweep them off of the drive and go back into the house. And the next day, the tree would drop some more.
I think that the tree is missing the Leaf Nazi becuase today I was out raking the lawn where “raking the lawn” means I was running the mower over the leaves so that I could empty the bag on the compost pile. And the tree has 90% of its leaves still on. Waiting. Waiting for the Leaf Nazi.
Who no longer lives next door.