To paraphrase a song from The Indigo Girls.

I have friends who tell me how I live the life. They tell me how good I have it as I travel pretty much every week to another town. I have spent weeks in Miami, and New Orleans. I have had amazing food in most every city I have visited.

And I get paid to do it.

And I do appreciate how good I have it. But it ain’t all sunshine and lollipops, my bitchachos….

As a Founding Father of The Magical Mystery Tour, Freak Show, and the Followers of Chaos I can tell you that life on the road is a daily struggle. Let me explain.

Packing to travel sucks. Period. There is no other way to sugar-coat it.

So you get to your hotel, check in, lug your bags to your room and relax. The next day it begins as soon as your day ends. The questions begin. Where do I eat? What do I eat? Do I order in? Do I go to restaurant?

If you are an unlimited expense account, which I am not, you could go out or eat in the hotel bar/restaurant. If, like me, you are a specific amount paid to you each day, you go cheap.

If I am working overnight it is easy. Most hotels offer a hot breakfast. It just differs from hotel to hotel as to how good it is. Even though it is hot.

If I am working during the day I have more options but I tend to go with a drive-thru, or I just get something from the Deli in the store where I am working.

But it doesn’t end there.

After gathering food, I still have to go back to the hotel…trek to my room.

Once in my room I need to: wash my hands and put on more lotion…eczema you weirdos….I need to take my meds, I need to empty my pockets, change into my lounging attire….shorts and a t-shirt.

Then, and only then do I get to eat the food I gathered. It isn’t like I can come home and whip open the fridge and start dinner…..

So….this shouldn’t read like a humble brag….though some of it really is……

I appreciate all who think I have the life……but the struggle is real, y’all.

Based upon individual perception, don’t you know….