Or maybe, “An Aversion To Adversity”.

I still am undecided about that.

No one likes it when things go bad. No one. We all deal with the negative things in our lives differently. Some just keep plugging along, taking it in stride. Some whine, bitch, and moan about it endlessly. Some shut down. I am of the shutting down team, which does not make for a great partner, husband, father, or employee.

I should have never worked as a manager of people. I should have found some other avocation where I did not have to lead a group. I was really never that good at it, and I never really liked that role. The bumps in the road would come, my team would look to me and all I wanted to do was to pull the covers over my head and not come out.

Strange words for someone who is not unwilling to put himself on the stage. Someone who writes these posts, and then hits enter. Someone who understands that there are more people out there just like me.

I had this conversation with Angie just the other day. Things have been piling up on me as of late, and I had started to shut down. Getting quiet….imagine that….not wanting to leave the house, sleeping a lot. She was concerned. It was a side of me that she had not seen. She is used to the blustering, bullshit slinging, fun guy.

You see, I grew up wild. Two hard-working parents who let me run. It was easy to do. We lived in a small town where I couldn’t get into a whole bunch of trouble.

When you get used to running wild, you tend not to listen to anything from anyone. And I didn’t. When you don’t listen, you tend not to ask questions. When you don’t ask questions, you end up lying to yourself because you think you know it all.

It took me way to many years to know that I didn’t. And I don’t.

Of course, the logic trail goes that if I had been more aware that my path would never had lead me to where I am now.

Or would it have?

These are the questions that at my age, I still ask myself. Because, who else would I?