I have spent the last few months extolling the virtues of retirement. The slowing down of having to do busy things. The ability to focus on those things that you never had time for previous. Paying attention to what would have been thought frivolous prior.
Previous. Prior. before.
Be prepared. This is going to be yet another reverie.
Reverie is defined as being pleasantly lost in your thoughts…a daydream. I seem to have been lost in reverie since my childhood. Wondering who I was, who I am, where I fit in.
The last of three sons. My brothers the hard-working, stable ones. Me? Head in the clouds. Moving from place to place, never seeming to settle down. Packing up the wreckage, and hoping that someplace new will make all the pieces fit together.
The weather in Arizona has turned to the colder side. Highs in the 70’s, with nightly lows in the mid 40’s. Sitting on the couch yesterday, drowsing under a throw I was taken back to my parents house in the Fall. The sun muted, the air outside chill, the furnace warming the interior of the house.
Having been in Arizona since August, I had gotten used to the Sun in its Summer path. Now that we are in the Fall, it is lower in the sky. Not as muted as I remember when I lived in Michigan, but still lower….not throwing off as much warmth.
The Fall in Michigan is what I remember most. The sensations. The smells. The minimal warmth of the sun. The chill of the air. Apple harvesting. Grape harvesting. Burning leaves. Wood smoke from fireplaces.
People, and places.
Memories brought to the forefront.
Head still in the clouds.